Like an oil spill across the sea,
The blood that trickled down the cross covers me.

new

Questioning the question, like it was asked out of line,
Stuck in time like it's a lesson, I guess a chance to learn mine,
Mine the gold from the teaching, watch the game, sit the pine,
Every step forward becomes two steps behind,

Why O why, can't the puzzle pieces click,
Can't the addict be okay and still get the fix?

Mix me some joy with a little bit of pain,
Pull the plug on the fun, all else the same.
Know inside you're not okay, but still rattle off the game,
Like a relationship is what you need, still deceived in vain.

Holding loose the grip that you hold on activity,
Leadership is lost, as control keeps mocking me.
Trying to melt the frost off this love that's rocking me,
While I'm pulling down the fence of my ego that's blocking me.

Why O why, can't the puzzle pieces click,
Can't the addict be okay and still get the fix?

One more relationship, one more hole,
Band-aid covered heart, bullet-wound soul,
Craving a smooth filling that will fill me full
Of the love that's killing me, sharp is better than dull.

Feel the sorrow of your neighbor, carry his load,
Hold your head towards heavens skies, the Father's abode.
Stand in victory,
Still,
Humbly raise
Your hands for the Savior, Lord, the Ancient of Days.

REJOICE...it's a command

undefined

Undefined slope, it knows no number,
Takes no limit, it receives no slumber,
Never stops, no top, no cap, no gap,
One of a kind, and it's a calculator blunder.

Saga is my food source, when I'm in a hurry,
Hit the noon-prayer, then to lunch, then in a flurry,
Then I hit the gas, run to class, we're the jury,
Talk about the Pagans, gods in a fury

Fight for Truth. Fight for Love.

Whatever you do, don't stand still.


WHEN PEOPLE GET THE WORDS OF GOD IN THEIR HANDS....WATCH OUT!

I hate myself for hating what I ought to love - at the point of opportunity. Later on I realize that what I did was that which honored God and I love that I obeyed. Then, I immediately hate the fact that I love my obedience, as if I was the one who "HONORED" God, as if I am high and mighty enough to praise myself for such devotion. Oh me of little love...

When will I touch Your Spirit, Lord?

Self-deprecation...it's a terrible thing...though sometimes I'm not sure because it's easy to overdose on self-"indulgence"....surely it is...You must increase, but I must decrease.

This tension, it's incredible...it pulls as if weights were attached to nails pierced through my skin all over my body...ripping my flesh from my bones...such tension is that between my spirit and my flesh.

My spirit is willing, but my flesh is weak...and so I'm torn....

We're fragile...and so we rip apart...we tear each other apart too...



Sometimes I'm sooooo weak....I can't handle something so petty without emotionally entering a secret tirade on the inside...I'm like a beast...I don't act like the man God made me to be...the man which God believes I should become.

Wonderfully and fearfully made...what does that mean?

Walking by faith?

In Spirit? and in Truth?
In Love?

Villians

Today I recognized, again, how I sometimes play the villain.

In my mind, I dictate the good,
I determine what I like, and all that I should,
Should I come upon that which is unpleasing to me,
I despise it in an instant, and continue on easy.

I'm like Amnon when I Pharisaicly act,
Deserving of death, in sin then retract,
Back into greater sin, where's the end at?

Deliverance by the sword...man's fatal pact.